Transdimensional Marketing

Chapter 373: Earthlings...Are Bloody Damned Ruthless!

Chapter 373 – Earthlings...Are Bloody Damned Ruthless!

Since humanity entered the atomic age, “strategic” weapons have never disappeared.

Whether it was for self-protection or offense, humans always needed to have some kind of weapon capable of deterring their enemies.

In fact, even before the industrial age, strategic weapons had already started appearing in various senses.

Meanwhile, such weapons came with their own pros and cons.

From a positive perspective, having strategic weapons allowed countries to keep each other in check.

From a negative perspective, once the “false” peace was broken, strategic weapons such as nuclear weapons would bring a devastating blow to human civilization.

However, so long as this false peace was maintained, strategic weapons would undoubtedly bring more good than bad.

As such, in the future, when humans finally stepped out of the solar system and discovered the existence of alien civilizations, the first thing they thought of was to create a strategic weapon that could deter their enemies and allow them to develop in peace.

Meanwhile, the blue supergiant the Transdimensional Marketing Company sent to Chen Yu was one of these strategic weapons.

It was “developed” in the year 7041 AD.

Around that time, when the neighboring intelligent civilizations were still researching weapons such as quantum cannonballs, high-aggregation destruction curtains, primary dimension manipulators, etc., humanity, a race born with the talent for waging wars, had already set its sights on the entire Milky Way.

Hence...

Without rest, humans began frantically collecting many old stars. Afterward, under the bewildered gazes of the surrounding civilizations, humans modified these dying red and blue supergiants, producing 175 “galaxy bombs” in just 120 years. They then scattered these bombs to various areas of the Milky Way galaxy, adjusted their angles, and strived to maximize the area of damage.

With just the push of a button, these bombs would detonate simultaneously, destroying the entire Milky Way!

The resulting explosion would most likely be second to only the Big Bang.

(Humanity: If we’re going down, all of you will go down with us! Ahahaha!)

At this point, the entire galaxy was stunned.

Even some of the more advanced intelligent civilizations had never seen such a crazy civilization before, and the conclusion they had was...

Earthlings are ruthless...

However, as everyone knew, there was a price to acting tough.

Supergiants were celestial bodies. They were not existences that intelligent creatures could freely manipulate.

While it might be easy to alter a star’s element ratio, reverting the changes was nigh-impossible.

A thousand years went by in the blink of an eye.

Those “galaxy bombs” had exhausted their hydrogen element one after another, reaching the end of their lifespan and entering their pre-death phase.

These galaxy bombs were not rubbish that could be tossed away easily. They couldn’t be destroyed like nuclear weapons, either. Yet, once these stars collapsed, the chain supernovas that came afterward would thoroughly clean the Milky Way.

Detonating these galaxy bombs individually wasn’t a feasible idea, either. The Milky Way galaxy was too crowded. The gamma-ray bursts that resulted from the explosions would kill everything they reached.

Initially, humans worried greatly about this problem.

However, when humans discovered that the other races were even more worried about this problem, they suddenly stopped worrying about it.

Seeing their neighbors’ reactions, humans decided to utilize two of their other talents—conducting negotiations and acting like a hoodlum. Humanity chose to negotiate with civilized civilizations, asking them to bear the terrifying cost of sending away these ticking time bombs through space-time wormholes.

What? You disagree? There’s nothing else to discuss, then. Let’s just set off these fireworks together. Who knows? Maybe some civilizations will get lucky and avoid extinction?

Hence.

This blue supergiant with a remaining shelf life of only four months was sent to Chen Yu’s side.

Evidently, over a hundred other reviewers living in parallel space-times had similarly received one.

“Dammit! This bunch of crazy bastards!”

Slowly putting away his phone, Chen Yu’s face under his mask revealed an uncertain expression.

This was no longer purely a business partnership. For the more “advanced” space-time, the ancient space-time was merely a waste disposal plant that they could dump their garbage and troubles at freely.

After taking a deep breath, Chen Yu held up his phone again and typed a reply.

[Chen Yu: “So, all that nice things you said before about a reward is basically your way of shirking responsibility?”]

[Transdimensional Marketing: “Mr. Chen, you misunderstand us. We are not shirking responsibility.”]

[Chen Yu: “What are you trying to do, then?”]

[Transdimensional Marketing: “We are dumping away our troubles.”]

[Chen Yu: “...I want to issue a complaint.”] (Unsent)

[Chen Yu: “Forget it. Ignore my last sentence. The only question I have now is how exactly do I deal with this thing. If it explodes at this place, Earth is dead.”]

[Transdimensional Marketing: “You can push it away!”]

[Chen Yu: “Do you think I can move it with a donkey?”]

[Transdimensional Marketing: “It shouldn’t be possible...”]

[Chen Yu: “Fuck! What should I do, then?! There are only four months left!”]

[Transdimensional Marketing: “What can you possibly do with just four months?”]

Chen Yu: “...”

[Chen Yu: “I have a feeling that you’re taking revenge on me right now.”]

[Transdimensional Marketing: “?? You’re overthinking things. Four months is more than enough for us to send you an excellent traction product. You can drag the star away with it at that time.”]

[Chen Yu: “I’m really finding it difficult to believe you right now. Tell me straight away. How far can that product drag this star away?”]

[Transdimensional Marketing: “Dragging it a hundred light-years away shouldn’t be a problem.”]

[Chen Yu: “What’s the point, then?! Isn’t Earth still dead when it explodes?!”]

[Transdimensional Marketing: “Mr. Chen, calm down. Although 100 light-years is a short distance, so long as you offset the star 30° away from the solar system, the gamma-ray burst will not harm the Milky Way.”]

[Chen Yu: “What about the remaining threats?”]

[Transdimensional Marketing: “At most, all electronic devices on Earth will be scrapped.”]

Looking up, Chen Yu gazed at the blue supergiant outside the spacecraft and held his forehead in pain.

“Friends, please wait a little longer. There is still a small problem. It will be solved immediately.”

After calming the audience with a few words, Chen Yu resumed typing a message.

[Chen Yu: “Fine. I surrender. Send it to me next month.”]

[Transdimensional Marketing: “That won’t do. I have already applied for an even more amazing product for next month’s review. I can’t change it.”]

[Chen Yu: “More?! You’re telling me you applied for more?!”]

[Transdimensional Marketing: “It’s only an adjective. The danger it poses is significantly lower. I swear.”]

[Chen Yu: “Can we discuss this? There’s no way I can explain this star to all of humanity, yet you want to make things worse?”]

[Transdimensional Marketing: “Maybe you should just write a complaint about me. Send it to the main branch’s customer service department located in the Kuiper Belt in 4552. My employee number is 23333.”]

[Chen Yu: “...Fine. Just you wait.”]

[Transdimensional Marketing: “Mhm, mhm.”]

Putting away his phone, Chen Yu closed his eyes and calmed himself for a moment. He then turned to the camera, spread out his arms, and opened his eyes.

“Dear viewers, sorry for the long wait.

“Let me tell you some good news. This blue supergiant isn’t something as dangerous as a stellar battleship. Actually, it is...

“Haha, it’s just a big firecracker!”