Walking Daddy

Do Han-Sol hobbled over as he regenerated his missing right arm.

“Mr. Lee Hyun-Deok, that bastard… It’s dead for sure, right?”

“Yeah, it’s dead. It’s finally over.”

I joined Kim Hyeong-Jun, lying down on the ground.

It was over. Everything was over. This damned, bloody fight, the constant worrying over what the future would hold, all of it was over. I sighed in relief as I looked up at the night sky, which was adorned with stars. Do Han-Sol scratched his head as he looked at the underlings around us.

“Wow… Look at the number of underlings we have left. I can’t think of any other word but ‘devastation.’ I can’t believe it took us this many underlings to take down one black creature…”

I nodded in response and pointed up to the sky.

“Let’s burn some incense for the dead and the underlings we lost once we clean up Jeju Island completely. Hopefully, when that’s done, they’ll be able to rest peacefully up there.”

"Of course."

Do Han-Sol nodded slowly and fell silent.

The cold winter wind, drifting in with the smell of nature, washed away the tension in our hearts. I gently closed my eyes, enjoying the peace in the moment. The sound of the leaves rustling and waves crashing had never sounded so sweet. We’d made it past the darkness of despair and reached the end of the tunnel, where hope had been waiting for us.

I only began to recognize the beauty of life after having that hope in my grasp.

Thud, thud, thud.

The sudden sound of footsteps tickled my ears, bringing back the sense of dread. I hurriedly got to my feet, my blue eyes flashing. I looked in the direction from which the sound was coming from, and saw a sea of people making their way to us.

These were people running toward us, not zombies.

I squinted to get a better look, and saw Lee Jeong-Uk in the very front. He was running as hard as he could, a bayonet affixed to his K2 rifle, his face full of determination.

“AHHHHHH!!!”

Lee Jeong-Uk let out a yell, and the guards behind him joined in as well. I waved both of my arms vigorously at them.

“Stop, stop!! Stop everyone!” I cried.

The people from the Survivor Rally Organization heard my voice and came to an uncertain halt, all looking bewildered. Lee Jeong-Uk looked at me with surprise in his eyes, clearly unsure of what was going on.

"What happened? What about the black creature? Are you okay?” he asked.

"First, calm down. Take a deep breath.”

It seemed like Lee Jeong-Uk and the guards had run non-stop. Everyone was gasping for air. Do Han-Sol interpose himself between Lee Jeong-Uk and me. He seemed annoyed by the fact that Lee Jeong-Uk was here instead of at Jeju Airport.

“I thought I told you to go to Jeju Airport earlier. Why’d you come here?”

“How are we supposed to leave you three behind?” cried Lee Jeong-Uk. “Come on!”

Do Han-Sol flinched as Lee Jeong-Uk looked around, panting. Kim Hyeong-Jun was on the ground, resting his chin on one arm as he watched Lee Jeong-Uk and the guards. In contrast to the guards, who had risked their lives and run all the way here, Kim Hyeong-Jun was in a state of utter peace. Only then did Lee Jeong-Uk gently press a hand against his temples and let out a sigh of relief.

“I thought you were dead, man!” he wailed at me, sorrow on his face.

“...”

I was taken aback at his reaction, unsure of why he was acting this way. I shifted my gaze slightly, looking at Do Han-Sol. He scratched his head with a puzzled look, then explained what had happened at Port Jeju, sounding as though he was trying to come up with an excuse.

“Oh um… About what happened earlier… Well, since the sample could’ve made the black creature stronger… I told Lee Jeong-Uk to take everyone to the airport.”

“Well, you told him the right thing.” I turned back to Lee Jeong-Uk. “Han-Sol did say the right thing. Why are you here?”

“What? Where do you think we’d go, man? It would probably be quicker if we took down the black creature together."

Lee Jeong-Uk looked at me up and down with his red, bloodshot eyes.

“Are you okay? You’re not dead, are you?”

“You don’t think you’re talking to a ghost right now, do you?”

"Haha, very funny.”

He bit his lower lip and hugged me tightly. I was taken aback by his unexpected behavior. I always guessed that he had a soft spot on the inside. I forced a smile and patted him on the back.

The guards then noticed the black creature’s corpse and threw me, Kim Hyeong-Jun, and Do Han-Sol up into the air to celebrate. It finally sank in that we had won and were done with this devastating war.

* * *

We cleaned up the surrounding area, and then finally returned to Port Jeju. Everyone who was there cheered in unison and welcomed us back. Heo Seong-Min came up to me, shedding tears of joy.

“Thank you! Thank you very much. Thank you very much for all you’ve done.”

I smiled lightly and held his hand tightly. All the people around were either crying tears of joy or smiling at the fact that we had regained peace for ourselves once and for all. My heart grew warm as I looked around at all of them.

"Daddy!"

While I was still in awe of the moment, I spotted So-Yeon running to me through the crowd. I got on one knee, spread my arms wide, and held So-Yeon in my arms. She cried and laughed at the same time, letting out the mixed feelings within her. Her expression and her gestures betrayed every single feeling that was running through her body.

I gently closed my eyes as I felt her warmth. She was as warm as could be. Her pounding heartbeat sent an indescribable shock of thrill and joy through my dead heart.

“My sweetheart, were you a good girl to your aunts and uncles?”

So-Yeon wiped her tears away and nodded vigorously. She was acting all pretty and cute, and I couldn’t help but smile. As we kept on hugging each other, the folks of Shelter Hae-Young—the principal and the elder, Han Seon-Hui and Seok-Hui, Lee Jeong-Hyuk and Choi Da-Hye, Kang Eun-Jeong and Kang Ji-Suk, Byeon Hyeok-Jin and Woo Ga-In, Bae Jae-Hwan and Shin Ji-Hye—all stopped by to congratulate me and celebrate my safe return.

I’d finally made it back to where So-Yeon and my people were, after crawling through what seemed to be a long, never-ending tunnel.

I was back home.

I turned my head slightly and looked at Kim Hyeong-Jun and Do Han-Sol. They were no different from me. Kim Hyeong-Jun was holding his wife and son in his arms, while Do Han-Sol was laughing together with Hwang Deok-Rok and Choi Soo-Hyun.

The three of us, who had been fighting on the front lines, were finally reunited with our families.

Lee Jeong-Uk swept his gaze across me and everyone else with a gentle, satisfied smile. His eyes quickly found Heo Seong-Min.

“Mr. Heo Seong-Min, shouldn’t we be celebrating this victory in a grand way today?” he said.

“Of course! No doubt about it! Please wait here. I’ll soon have everything prepared.”

Heo Seong-Min sniffled and smiled brightly, then headed to the food storage area with Park Hye-In.

* * *

As we took in the peace that we’d finally obtained, the discussion quickly turned toward what we would do with the bright future ahead of us. Some expressed their desire to do some farming on Jeju Island, while others talked about looking for houses with solar panels installed on them. Others even brought up the idea of wind and hydroelectric power generation facilities.

So many were in deep discussion, brainstorming on how to return this ruined, damned world back to how it used to be. I left them to talk amongst themselves and took a step back to spend some free time with So-Yeon at the red lighthouse, located to the north. We both sat down to enjoy the view of the vast, endless ocean. As I looked out into the ocean, So-Yeon buried her face in my arms.

“Are you cold, sweetheart?”

"No? I’m okay!”

So-Yeon giggled as she buried her face in my chest. I smiled gently as I wordlessly looked out at the calm sea.

I couldn’t help but think how much time I’d have with So-Yeon from now on. I knew I had to clean the streets of Jeju Island of the remaining zombies and leave for Russia before my zombie instincts awakened. All this would take just over a month at most, or so I thought.

However, it was all just speculation. In fact, I wasn’t sure how much time I actually had left. However, I knew that even if I could spend the rest of my life here with So-Yeon, it wouldn’t be enough. So, in order to not look back on this moment with regret, I planned on spending all the time I had with So-Yeon, until the others and I had to clean up Jeju Island.

"What are you doing here?" Lee Jeong-Uk’s voice came from behind us.

He was walking over Han Seon-Hui. So-Yeon smiled brightly and waved at them. He looked at us and scratched his sideburns.

“I think I’ll come back later. Don\'t want to disturb your moment, you know?” he said.

“Why, what’s up?”

Lee Jeong-Uk smiled lightly as he drew closer. “Oh nothing. I just thought I’d stop by, you know. I didn’t have anything else to do, so, yeah.”

He then pinched So-Yeon\'s chubby cheek.

“Sweetie So-Yeon, are you happy that you’re with Daddy?”

"Yeah! It’s great!”

So-Yeon looked up at me and smiled, her eyes shining bright. Right then, she was the cutest thing to me. Every single word she said, every face she made, they were all so precious to me. I couldn’t help but smile gently and pat her head.

With that, Lee Jeong-Uk and Han Seon-Hui waved goodbye and walked away. I looked back at So-Yeon.

“So, does my sweetheart have anything she wanted to say to Daddy? Any complaints?” I asked gently.

"Huh? Hmm… No!”

"Oh, really? Well, Daddy thinks So-Yeon has something on her mind, no?”

I tickled her sides with a big smile on my face, and So-Yeon wriggled about, smiling cheerfully.

“Sweetheart, you can let it out today. I’ll listen to whatever you have to say today.”

“Really?”

“Of course. Have you ever seen Daddy lie to you?”

“Hmm… Then…”

So-Yeon touched her lips and mumbled under her breath. After a moment, she finally found the courage to speak up.

“I want a dog.”

"Huh? A pup… a puppy?”

"Yeah! I want the three of us to live here together!”

I didn’t know what to say to her. I had no idea where I would be able to get a puppy. And besides, I… I knew that I couldn’t stay on Jeju Island forever. However, I wasn’t sure if it would be better to tell her a white lie, or to be straight with her. So-Yeon’s expression slowly grew serious, and her tone of voice grew cautious.

“The other uncles said that we don’t have to go anywhere anymore and that we’ll be safe here from now on… Can we get a dog, please?”

“Of course we can! Daddy was just wondering where we’d be able to find a puppy, that’s all.”

In reality, though, I knew that I couldn’t live with So-Yeon anymore and that there was no way I could get her a puppy. Putting the puppy aside, I urgently needed a cure in order to be with So-Yeon. However, since I didn’t have a good enough answer to give her, I pointed to the stars that filled the night sky instead.

“So-Yeon, look up in the sky. Look at all those stars up there. Aren’t they amazing?” I said.

So-Yeon didn\'t reply. Kids these days caught on to what was happening right away. It seemed she’d noticed that I was trying to move on to another topic. The slight part in her lips, as she stared up into the night sky, showed her true feelings. I could tell that she didn’t like the fact that I hadn’t answered her question, but at the same time, she was awed by the tens, even hundreds of thousands of stars glittering away in the dark night sky.

I was grateful and proud of So-Yeon, since I knew she was just pretending not to know what was going on. I looked into So-Yeon’s eyes.

“So-Yeon.”

"Huh?”

“Do you remember what I used to look like?”

“Hmm…”

So-Yeon looked away without completing her sentence. I wondered if she was used to seeing me as a zombie with sharp teeth and blue eyes. It seemed like she had a hard time remembering how I used to look as a human being.

I pressed my lips together into a thin smile, then continued.

“You know Uncle Tommy and Uncle Alyosha from Russia, right?”

"Yeah!"

“Well, they said they can change me back, so that I can look the way I used to, in the past.”

"Really?"

I pointed toward the horizon.

“But to do so, I’d have to travel across the ocean, to a place far, far away.”

Her expression grew puzzled.

“Can’t you just transform here?”

“There\'s a machine that will transform Daddy, but it’s somewhere far, far away. Can So-Yeon wait for Daddy for a little while, until he’s done transforming and comes back?”

So-Yeon seemed to contemplate this, and after a while, she replied with a question of her own.

“How many nights do I have to wait?”

How long did she, did I, have to wait…? That really was the important question. I wondered if So-Yeon would be able to understand. So, instead of answering, I patted her head and held her in my arms.

“So-Yeon knows how much Daddy loves you, right?” I said quietly after a while.

“...”

So-Yeon didn’t say a single word. An eight-year-old wouldn’t have trouble understanding what I was trying to say. I was certain she understood what I was trying to tell her.

That I was saying goodbye to her.

* * *

The next day, the survivors at Port Jeju returned to Hotel L and Hotel O, while Kim Hyeong-Jun, Do Han-Sol, Kim Dae-Young, Jeong Jin-Young and I began cleaning up the remaining zombies on Jeju Island.

Kim Hyeong-Jun and Do Han-Sol took charge of the east, while Kim Dae-Young, Jeong Jin-Young and I dealt with the west. Cleaning up Jeju Island wasn’t too difficult, because there weren’t any other big cities apart from Jeju-si and Seogwipo-si. The other cities were more akin to small villages. Compared to what we had to go through in Seoul, combing through the concrete jungle full of high-rise apartments, Jeju Island was a lot easier to handle.

As we took care of the zombies, I was able to replenish some of the underlings I’d lost during the fight. Since there were also zombies in Russia, I recruited the bare minimum number of troops that I thought I needed in order to fight them. Mood Swinger and Ji-Eun mercilessly chewed through and swallowed the street zombies like beasts that had been starving for a long time. Thanks to the zombie fodder, the two of them quickly regenerated their damaged body parts.

The zombies were no threat, but because we had to clean up the entire island, it took us the better part of half a month to get most of the clean-up done. During this time, we took care of the main streets, coastal roads, and buildings in the cities. It took us another half a month to thoroughly comb through Mt. Halla and the countless forest trails, hills, caves, and other places that were not frequented by people.

Finally, after a month of constant hard work, Jeju Island became a perfectly safe island, free of zombies.

As the sun crawled toward the horizon far, far away, all the remaining zombies on Jeju Island, including myself, gathered at Seongsan Ilchulbong and congratulated each other for all our efforts and the hard work we had put in.

Kim Hyeong-Jun stretched his sore shoulders as he looked at me.

“Ahjussi, did you see the meadow in front of Baengnokdam Lake?”

“What about it?”

“I saw some horses there.”

"Horses?"

His random comment took me off-guard, but the fact that there were animals here made the wheels in my mind start to turn. If there were horses, there could be pigs around as well. Before the world had turned upside down, Jeju Island had been known for its horses and black pigs.

Pigs could be a good source of meat for the survivors, while the horses could help plow the fields since horses were the first animals humans used to plow fields when cows weren’t available.

In contrast to me, who was all serious about what to do next, Kim Hyeong-Jun flashed a hearty grin.

“You should at least see So-Yeon Baengnokdam Lake before we leave. It’d be nice to see some horses and trees together, wouldn’t you say?”

“...”

He had a point. Perhaps… Perhaps it was time to let go of all the responsibilities I’d been carrying all this time. Even though it had been a month, whenever I heard some new information, I automatically thought of it through the lens of how the survivors could use the information to improve their survival. As the saying went, old habits die hard. I smiled lightly and nodded.

“So, when are we leaving?” asked Do Han-Sol.

“Tomorrow evening.”

“The flight’s already been arranged?”

“Choi Kang-Hyun said he’d be joining us.”

Choi Kang-Hyun was the pilot who had been part of the survivors from Gangnam that had come over to Gwangjang-dong. He told us that he would join us willingly, even if it cost him the comfortable life on Jeju that was in front of him.

- Well, it’s not like I have a family to take care of, and I’d be more than happy to contribute to saving this world with this rather insignificant ability of mine.

That was what he’d told me when I asked him about it. I was really grateful that he’d made such a decision. I knew how much courage it took to make such a decision.

Do Han-Sol looked at me and hesitated as if there was something he wanted to say. I chuckled and met his gaze.

"What is it?” I asked. “If there’s something you want to say, say it now.”

"Oh… Um… Did you tell So-Yeon about this? That you’ll be leaving tomorrow?”

“Not yet…”

“So-Yeon looked very happy over this past month. Watching you spend time with her whenever you had the chance… Now that you’re leaving, I just feel a little bit…”

His head sagged, and he grimaced. I knew where he was coming from, and gazed toward the sunset, my lips pressed together in a thin line.

I didn’t feel the need to add on to what he’d said, because I was feeling the same way. I also didn’t want the time I had with So-Yeon to end, but it was something that had to be done. Kim Hyeong-Jun wiggled his eyebrows up and down.

“Hey, hey, what is this?” he said. “It’s not like we’re going off to die or something, right? We’re going to save people, you know?”

“Well, I can say the same to you too. Aren’t you worried about your wife and son?”

“Why are you worried about my wife and son?” Kim Hyeong-Jun replied with a smirk. “Let me ask you this; why are you not telling Ms. Soo-Hyun regarding how you really feel about her?” he continued, teasing Do Han-Sol.

Do Han-Sol blushed and slapped him on the forearm, probably feeling embarrassed. Kim Hyeong-Jun rubbed his stinging arm and looked at me.

“Ahjussi, did you see that? Even Han-Sol’s hitting me these days. I think there’s an issue with the hierarchy among us, don’t you think?”

“Since when did we have a hierarchy? It seems to me like you got slapped because you deserved to get slapped.”

"Wow, wow, wow… There’s no one on my side. Absolutely no one.”

Kim Hyeong-Jun clicked his tongue and looked at Kim Dae-Young and Jeong Jin-Young, who merely shrugged.

"Whatever! Let’s move on,” grumbled Kim Hyeong-Jun as he kicked a rock on the ground. “If we’re going to bring down the mood by talking about this sad stuff, I’d suggest that every one of you go back and spend more time with the ones you wish to before it’s too late. I’m going to go see my handsome son and my pretty wife.”

With that, Kim Hyeong-Jun headed back to Hotel L. The others hurriedly got to their feet to cheer Kim Hyeong-Jun up while I looked up at the red, glowing sky, letting myself feel the full weight of the sadness that I couldn\'t possibly share with the others.

To be honest, I didn’t want to leave, just like the others. The last thing I wanted to do was to leave my baby behind. However, if my existence itself was a nuisance, a burden to my child, and to the people I loved so much… then perhaps leaving was the right thing to do.

* * *

The next day, I climbed Mt. Halla with So-Yeon. We walked through the forest, surrounded by trees, climbed Baengnokdam together, and made memories that would forever stay with us as we took in the scenery of Jeju Island. Just as Kim Hyeong-Jun mentioned, we saw horses grazing in the meadow on our way down.

So-Yeon smiled more cheerfully than ever, commenting that it seemed like we were at the zoo. I took in her innocent smile, trying to engrave it into my memories, and tried all the more to keep the unknown sadness from getting the best of me. I knew I should be laughing at her having a good time, but I couldn’t keep my brow from furrowing.

I hoped that my pretty daughter So-Yeon, my daughter whom I never got sick and tired of, would not end up crying because her father wasn’t with her, and that she would listen to her uncles and aunts, and grow up to her full potential.

I couldn\'t bear to say goodbye to So-Yeon.

The two of us sat on a wooden bench, talking and spending time together until dust darkened the once bright-blue sky. She eventually fell asleep as we looked into the sunset. I assumed it was because of all the walking we had done throughout the day.

I carried So-Yeon on my back and headed back to Hotel L with a feeling of emptiness as I tried to store everything that had happened that day in my memories. As I approached Hotel L, Lee Jeong-Uk and Han Seon-Hui were there to welcome me back.

“Did you get to tell her about it?”

I shook my head without saying a word. My face was terrible, and Lee Jeong-Uk’s expression grew sorrowful as well. I passed So-Yeon over to Han Seon-Hui, who had been standing behind Lee Jeong-Uk.

“Please, please take good care of her for me.”

“I’ll raise her as if she was my own daughter.”

Han Seon-Hui teared up, as she bit her lower lip and held So-Yeon in her arms.

“Hmm… Daddy…”

So-Yeon called me in her sleep. I clamped down on my trembling heart and gently caressed her cheeks. I brushed her bangs and gave her a kiss on the forehead. With that, I closed my eyes and walked toward Jeju Airport. I knew that if I stayed any longer, I would lose the courage to leave, and be overtaken by the desire not to be separated from her even more.

Lee Jeong-Uk followed me to the airport.

“You have to make her wish come true,” he said.

“What wish?”

“Her Christmas present.”

When I raised my eyebrows and tilted my head, Lee Jeong-Uk’s expression grew puzzled.

“Didn’t you hear what So-Yeon said in Seoul? When we were on the cruise ship?”

“No, I didn’t.”

“She said that you didn’t have to be Superman, and that she wanted you to come back as the old you and spend time with her. She said this a couple of times. You really didn’t hear her?”

I remembered that I hadn’t been able to hear her properly because of the boat horn. I looked at him in bewilderment, and Lee Jeong-Uk patted my shoulder.

“Please come back,” he said. “The day you return… I’ll make sure you receive a very warm welcome.”

“...”

“I’ll light up all the streetlights and roll out a carpet for you as a way of congratulating you.”

I bit my lower lip and nodded slowly.

* * *

Once I got to Jeju Airport, I saw Kim Hyeong-Jun, Do Han-Sol, Kim Dae-Young, and Jeong Jin-Young in front of the military transport plane.

They all seemed rather calm on the outside.

However, I knew that they were bottling up their emotions just like I was. I took a deep breath and spoke up.

“You’ve done a fantastic job so far. For our children, our friends, and our families. I’m proud of each and every single one of you for trying your best. Thank you.”

“Ahjussi, we’re not getting deployed, you know,” said Kim Hyeong-Jun with a grin, finding a joke for the moment. “Come back down to earth, ahjussi. Literally.”

Everyone around him coughed dry coughs, trying their best not to laugh. I couldn’t keep a grin from spreading across my face.

We’d been through long, hellish days together, and there really wasn’t any need to say much more. I cleared my throat and continued where I had left off.

“From now on, we won’t be fighting for our families, but for ourselves. Let’s survive until the end, to reach the day that we can live like human beings again.”

We exchanged sharp nods and boarded the military transport plane. I was the last one to board, and exchanged a final glance with Lee Jeong-Uk. He nodded back, his lips tightly closed. Without saying a single word, we both knew how the other was feeling, and could understand and sympathize with the other.

I let out a deep breath and made it into the plane, knowing that if I had stopped to say something, it would have been followed by something else, and something after that as well. A moment later, the plane’s hatch closed, and the roar of the engines started to pick up.

I sat down in my seat and took a deep breath.

‘Let\'s not be sad.’

‘Let\'s not look back.’

‘I\'m not leaving So-Yeon behind. I’m leaving for So-Yeon’s sake, and I’m leaving for my own good.’

For me, this was all part of the journey, one that led to the day that I would be able to see So-Yeon face-to-face as a proud human being again, and to be able to experience my end as a human being someday. The only way to accomplish these things was to move forward.

I spent all my life chasing what was waiting for me because I couldn’t look back. And since I couldn’t look back, I knew I had lived a life with no regrets.

All of us, myself included, had been like that up to this point, and I knew we would continue to live the same way. Because that was the only thing that this zombie life had taught me, ever since I’d been trapped in my apartment, all those months ago.

Everything I’d done, and all that I would be doing, was for the sake of a better tomorrow, for a day where we could once again dream about the future.

Just like any other day, I prepared myself for the next day that lay ahead of me.

[ Walking Daddy, the end ]